Wean Me Gently

We are one year into our breastfeeding relationship, and I have no plans of weaning until he is good and ready. But I found this poem and it got me good. Motherhood is non-stop beautiful heartbreak.

Wean Me Gently

by Cathy Cardall

I know I look so big to you,

Maybe I seem too big for the needs I have.

But no matter how big we get,

We still have needs that are important to us.

I know that our relationship is growing and changing,

But I still need you. I need your warmth and closeness,

Especially at the end of the day

When we snuggle up in bed.

Please don't get too busy for us to nurse.

I know you think I can be patient,

Or find something to take the place of a nursing;

A book, a glass of something,

But nothing can take your place when I need you.

Sometimes just cuddling with you,

Having you near me is enough.

I guess I am growing and becoming independent,

But please be there.

This bond we have is so strong and so important to me,

Please don't break it abruptly.

Wean me gently,

Because I am your mother,

And my heart is tender.

Happy International Women's Day!

I couldn't have said it better myself. Via Chookooloonks.

Especially:

10.  Your ability or inability to accomplish something should never be defined by your gender.  Ever.  Some people will try to argue that simply by virtue of your gender, you are biologically incapable of doing something, but unless that Something directly involves certain very specific contributions to the creation of a new human life, then frankly, they are misinformed.

Happy First Birthday, Felix!

To Felix, who was born one year ago today.

To me, whose birth as a mother has been long and laborious and continued after the baby emerged from my body.
To Chris, whose birth as a father walks with mine hand in hand.

We made it out of the labyrinth of the first year, y'all.

Here he is eating a celebratory stick at the playground.

Happy birthday, sweet baby boy.

My dear Suzi over at Laundry Line Divine

It occurs to me that I have been horribly remiss in linking to my beloved friend Suzi Banks Baum, light behind the blog Laundry Line Divine and now the fantastic revolution called Out of the Mouths of Babes.

I wish you could meet her. She is one seriously passionate woman. Her blog's tagline is "seeing and celebrating the sacred in daily life," and boy, does she inspire me with exactly how artfully she does this. She is a writer, an artist, an organizer, a pleasure revolutionary -- oh yes, and she is a mother and wife, which provide the unique lens through which she organizes much of her work.

And as you would imagine with all of this inner glow, she is wildly beautiful on the outside, too.

Here she is in September at the restaurant Home.

This woman is one of my nearest and dearest. For almost four years, we have talked on the phone every week to spring clean (one of Mama Gena's tools -- I'll explain in another post). We have shared our hearts with each other through joy, birth, death, and everything in between, and she has been gently patient with me this past year as I adjusted to being a new mom and my time went haywire. I treasure her friendship and am over the moon with pride about her new project.

Suzi is in the midst of launching a reading series called "Out of the Mouths of Babes: An Evening of Mothers Reading to Others." The first event is on March 2nd at 7:00 p.m. and is part of the Berkshire Festival of Women Writers. Be there early so you don't miss the lullaby that opens the evening.

“No mother is lacking in creativity,” says Banks Baum. “Whether she stays at home with her children, or works outside of the home while someone else looks after her kids, she is using major creative muscles to make it all work. My desire is to provide women with a vehicle to discuss the importance of creativity in their daily lives; to witness the beauty of words written by other mothers; and to emerge from this event inspired to celebrate and engage with their own creativity.”

If you are anywhere in the northeast, I urge you to get yourself to her neck of the woods for this event. There will be bedtime snacks served; pajamas are optional.

This post is being written tonight because I was in the middle of savoring a Mary Oliver poem that she posted when I realized that I have never linked our two online worlds. So here we go, for all 3 of my readers. Please go spend some time in her backyard. Hang a garment or two on her line. You will feel better because of it.

Here is the first stanza of the poem she posted. You'll have to go to her site to read the rest.

To Begin with, the Sweet Grass

1.

Will the hungry ox stand in the field and not eat
of the sweet grass?
Will the owl bite off its own wings?
Will the lark forget to lift its body in the air or
forget to sing?
Will the rivers run upstream?

Behold, I say – behold
the reliability and the finery and the teachings
of this gritty earth gift.

....

Recipe for Green Smoothie in 26 Easy Steps

Ingredients:

5 cubes of honeydew melon

About 2 inches of cucumber, peeled

1 orange, peeled and halved

1 apple, seeds removed and quartered  sliced

Handful of spinach

4 slices of frozen peaches

1 cup almond milk

One Jennifer, mostly awake

One Chris

One 11-month-old baby

One nosy, bull-headed, large dog (preferably doberman/pit/rottweiler mix)

One G-shock watch

Prep time: 45 minutes.

Directions:

1. Holding the baby, pull the ingredients out of the fridge. Be sure to squat instead of bend over to keep baby from falling out of your arms and to get a little boost in your core.

2. Stepping around the sniffing dog, set all food ingredients on counter for Chris to make smoothie.

3. Pull paring knife from drawer with mostly-awake hands.

4. Drop knife onto wood floor. Important: react quickly and jump out of the way as it clatters to the floor, hitting nothing but the wood. Thank your lucky stars that the baby is in your arms and the dog was out of the way.

5. Squat again to pick up the knife. Put knife on cutting block and walk away.

6. Chris should now start to make the smoothie. Cut into the cucumber and notice that there is the tiny metal point of the knife is missing.

7. Check the bottom of all feet (except the baby's).

8. Run super-strong magnet over the floor, including the crunchy under-counter corners. Come up with only food crumbs. Chris and baby should now retreat to the baby-proofed part of the house.

10. Put dog in his crate. Ignore his whining and yelping while you sweep carefully the entire kitchen and eating area. Once swept, use wet mop over the same floor area. Notice that the wet mop's scent is called "Open Window Scent" in English, and "Parfum GRAND Air" in French.

11. Finish cleaning the floor. Chris should set baby down in living room to do another sweep.

12. Jennifer should put ingredients into blender in the order listed above.

13. Baby should find dog's water bowl, tip it over, and splash happily in the water. Baby should not finish until his lower half is entirely soaked and he is grinning and clapping his hands.

14. Chris should clean up the water, undress and re-clothe the baby, who should screech in protest.

15. Jennifer should finish putting ingredients into blender, but wait to start blender until baby is reclothed and in arms, because the sound scares him.

16. In the meantime, Jennifer should wash the rice maker bowl soaking in the sink from last night and put away dishes in the drying rack.

17. Dog should settle and accept his crated state.

18. Once baby is in arms, run blender. Notice that, despite it being a fancy super-blender, the apple quarters are sticking in the blade and not blending.

19. Use blender wand to push apple chunks into the blades. Keep using the wand. Turn off blender, remove from base, shake to loosen. Add more almond milk. Blend again.

20. Notice that smoothie is getting warm and frothy because of blade action. Add more frozen peach slices.

21. Apple chunks should now loosen and blend.

22. Once mostly smooth, pour into two glasses.

23. Hear plop in the bathroom. Parents, wonder if you engaged the childproof lock on the toilet the last time you used it. Realize that you probably didn't. Rush in and find Chris's G-shock watch (waterproof!) in the toilet. Thank your lucky stars that you did not let it mellow last time the toilet was used.

24. Take picture of first item dropped in toilet.

25. Remove and clean watch with hot water and soap. Wash baby's hands. Wash your hands.

26. At last, put baby in highchair, feed rice crackers and salmon. Parents, drink now-lukewarm smoothies.

Serves 4.